owlectomy: A squashed panda sewing a squashed panda (Default)
If you ever catch yourself thinking, "How did my pre-cut butternut squash go bad so fast? Well -- there's only a few little moldy bits, I guess I can just cut those off, I shouldn't waste food, and anyway I've already got the recipe going..." --

This is the voice of experience telling you to order pizza.

(Maybe I can find frozen squash, in the future? It's just that hacking at the squash takes so long, even with a good sharp knife...)
owlectomy: A cartoon capybara munching on a rice ball (capybara)
Well, that's one more checkmark I can put in the column of "hilarious kitchen fires" and "reasons why Emily should not be trusted to complete basic household tasks without adult supervision."

Lit up a burner so that I could heat up my cast-iron skillet to fry some onions. Turned around to chop said onions. Turned back to the stove and noticed:

-Black smoke, that's a bad thing, right?
-That smell, that's a bad thing, right?
-HOOOOOOKAI THERE SHOULD NOT BE SO MUCH FLAME COMING FROM MY BURNER.

It was my spatula handle that was on fire. Because somehow I had left my spatula on the stove with the handle over the burner, and I managed not to notice it.

SEE GUYS I TOLD YOU I WAS RIGHT TO BE SCARED OF GAS STOVES.

Turned on the water in the sink, grabbed the spatula by the spatula end, and stuck the flaming part under the water, so it was over fast enough, and now I have some cornbread in the oven and I do hope it will come out not smelling of plastic smoke.

The spatula is still perfectly usable.
owlectomy: A squashed panda sewing a squashed panda (Default)
1. Mix up a bowl of milk and cornstarch.

2. Mix up another bowl of cornmeal and spices.

3. Go into the fridge to get your tofu. Realize that you have been lazy in storing your tofu and it no longer looks or smells like something that would be good to cook.

4. Go down to the grocery store. It is closed.

5. Go down to Target. Hey, it has a pretty good selection of Morningstar fake meat; you never know.

6. Discover that most of the cold-foods section of Target is under renovation.

7. Become anxious at the high number of screaming children, children on scooters, and people saying "YEAH I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I CAME IN FOR" on their cell phones while completely blocking the aisle.

8. Buy some frozen pizzas.

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owlectomy: A squashed panda sewing a squashed panda (Default)
owlectomy

April 2017

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